MISTER POO

God poos. It is not for negotiation.

The bible says He made us like Him and so He must shit. Also, He must wank and piss and lie and cheat and think about inappropriate sexual adventures from time to time.
This is God. He made you like Him.

If you never let anyone fuck with your mind, it means you will forever remain a mental virgin.
Open up and get loose.

Surrender an orifice, let some idiot scramble the insides of your head with their cock of nonsense.
I mean, apart from Isaac Newton, who dies a virgin?

Why should I care? The shite of twenty thousand dead dinosaurs and a hundred million trees.
Condensed are wormed over centuries, flattened by earth-weight and squeezed to perfection before finally being extracted by some smart asses and sold to me.

For what?
To drive the poo-mobile to shit town and buy some crap?
I should be so blessed.

This is Socrates- not the one that used to play for Brazil, but the ancient Greek Philsopher style of a Socrates.

You will notice that he’s not the prettiest eye candy in the store. His philsophy was that a person should always try to “do well” and that one should “know thyself”.
This plainly didn’t apply [...]

A man called Jason Mortimer was arrested for drunk and disorderly behaviour in Lincoln, Egnland.
In his overnight cell he smeared the words “please help” on the wall, using his own faeces, according to the Lincolnshire Echo.
Mortimer was given a 12-month conditional discharge and ordered to pay £60 in court costs.

Is this the help he [...]

According to this blog, animals produce 130 times the amount of excrement that human beings do.
And yet…

Humans produce roughly 130 times the amount of philosophy that animals do.
We not only feed them, but supply them with endless wisdom.
They shit up the air with their foul emissions while we grind our brains to find answers to [...]

Kant wrote The Critique of Pure Reason in 1781. It was 800 long pages of thick Philosophy and no one wanted to read it.
He also wrote about the great earthquake of Lisbon and this was so popular it sold by the page.

So, high thoughts give way to the low.
Philosophy is for later,
The shit is for [...]

Here is part of a letter of complaint recently received at the local Council in Kirklees, Yorkshire, England.
My wife and myself regularly take our grandchildren to Crow Nest Park in Dewsbury on Sunday mornings, and we all really enjoy the swings and slides etc.
However, the last two Sundays (March 7 and March 16) the slides [...]

Fourteen fragments of fossilised faeces have been found in a cave in Oregon, USA. Scientists are happy for they have “fresh” evidence in their puzzle to find how humans make their appearance in the American continent.
Is there any philosophy who survives from this time?

And in the future - what will remain?
Will our petrified [...]

While Zimbabwe awaits election results, the economic situation forces people to use human shit as fertilizer for their crops.

The Zimbabwean Broadcasting Corporation has reported that villagers from Chihota are fighting shortages and inflation by collecting human waste in specially designed toilets.
The resulting “humanure” replaces the ordinary compound D and ammonium nitrate fertilisers which are in [...]